fears

Validation

Sometimes, I think this is what most people need. It’s not about whether or not someone understands the problem you’re dealing with, but that someone can take the time to understand. But sometimes, best of all, it’s nice to know that you’re not the only one.

My first year in grad school I was afraid and anxious. I kept wondering if I was qualified to be there and if I was capable enough to survive grad school. Yes, I know that there are other people who do well and are able to do it, but I didn’t feel like I was excellent enough a student to be there. So when I found out that some of my other classmates felt like I did, felt overwhelmed, scared, and afraid, I felt so much better knowing that I wasn’t the only one who had this feeling of self-doubt.

Even if you can’t personally relate, validating someone’s feelings can just mean so much more to them. I know it does for me.

Back to the work!

Four more weeks!

Eeek!

No Fears

I was at a dinner party the other day and we were asked a really nice icebreaker-style question: What would you do if you had no fear? Unfortunately, I was told to give a superficial answer so I said that I wanted to drive a monster truck so I could go over all the people who get in my way while driving. Slightly dark, but whatever. It was the best superficial thing I could think of at the time.

What I had originally wanted to say was to love. To love someone fully, without reservations, without insecurities, without fear. To feel like I felt when I was a teenager – just love freely and truly feel as if I could jump in head first, feet first, body first into someone and just be free. Now the relationships are full of apprehension, fears, reluctance. Will this person hurt me? Will I allow myself to be hurt? Will this person still love me if that person knows everything there is to know about me? All of those fears, would be gone and to feel that true moment of happiness, to know that the person you are with will love you no matter what? That is love. That is love without fear and if I were to ever get married someday, that would be the question I’d ask myself:

Can I love this person without any fears?

If that answer is yes, then my answer will be yes to any proposal that comes my way from that person. Whoever he may be.